2015 September “FROM MY PERSPECTIVE”
A mosquito landed on my
teen’s face right after she sassed me……easiest decision of the week!
This passage is about envy. You know that issue we all have once
in a while when we forget to count our blessings. “A note of caution: We can never achieve goals that envy sets for
us. Looking at your friends and wishing you had what they had is a waste of
precious energy. Because we are all unique, what makes another happy may do the
opposite for you. That's why advice is nice but often disappointing when
needed.”―
Marcus Buckingham
In a Supreme Court sentiment of opposition to a prevailing idea, Justice Scalia
recently used the terms “pure applesauce” and “jiggery-pokery”. Both of the terms are colloquial expressions meaning
“deceitful or dishonest manipulation; hocus pocus, humbug.” They are usually considered British in
usage. I’ve never heard “jiggery-pokery”, but I have
heard “applesauce”. When I was a teen, I
told my mother a lie thinking I’d gotten away with it, she responded, “Trudy
Jean, that is pure applesauce and you know it.”
It confused me because I knew there was a jar of that stuff in the
refrigerator. Years later when I became
a mother I used that term, but it came after the announcement to a difficult child,
“I’m the boss, applesauce!” I
heard the fridge door open.
Many of you know how much
I like words…different ones are even better.
Here is one I came across.
CLINOMANIA (n) an excessive desire to stay in bed. I’m sure some of you can identify.
I always wanted to know what it was like to be
wealthy and not worry about $$. Well, at
my age of 70 I’ve found out. I have
silver in my hair, gold in my teeth, crystals in my kidney, iron in my arteries,
lead in my butt, and an inexhaustible supply of natural gas. Such a deal!
Brenduhh showed up at the
front door the other morning carrying a 100-piece puzzle in a box. She was a bit irritated. “What’s wrong, Brenduhh? I see you have a puzzle with you.” “Yes, I do.
I was hoping you’d help me with it.
The box says, ‘2-4 years’. I
don’t have that much time to work on this puzzle. Could you help me, please?” “How about some coffee or tea, sweetie? We can put it together at the kitchen table,”
I said.
Why are there no Wal-Marts
in Iraq, Afghanistan and Iran? There are too many "Targets".
Have you ever watched a
dog chasing its tail, laughed, and thought they are easily amused? Did you stop to think you were watching the
dog chase its tail? Hmmmm.
While walking through the
cereal aisle at the grocery store, I noticed all the kids’ cereals where at eye
level of a shopping cart. The CHEERIOS,
KIX, Shredded Wheat, ALL-BRAN, Raisin Bran, and SPECIAL K were not. I guess CAPTAIN CRUNCH, the waskaly wabbit
TRIX, COUNT CHOCULA, and FRUIT LOOPS got together and kicked them out to the
top and very bottom shelves. The RICE
KRISPIES were next to the marshmallows, though, on a shelf all their own. I guess the management couldn’t decide if
they were for kids or grown-ups or both.
This is from one of my favorite
comedians, George Carlin. He was so
observant and shared his observations. “Remember to spend some time with your loved
ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who
looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave
your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is
the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent. Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your
partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace
will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment
for someday that person will not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And,
give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind. And always remember, life is not measured by
the number of breaths we take, but by those moments that take our breath
away.” I would like to add: give a smile to someone each day. It may be the only one they get and it will
be a treasure to them.
Last month I told you
about my friends who are raising black and white hens for eggs. They haven’t laid any eggs, yet, they told
me. I suggested they show the girls the
cast iron skillet they use in the kitchen.
“Tell them what it is. Tell them
it may be their permanent home away from home.”
Someone mentioned getting a rooster.
They did and named him Stew. He’s
busy now.
In Sunday school class, we
were discussing how the people wandered in the desert for 40 years. I mentioned, “Of course they did. None of the leaders asked a woman to take
over and lead them to somewhere the masses would enjoy and be comfortable. Men don’t use maps or ask for
directions. They just walk around
aimlessly….sometimes for 40 years telling those complaining, ‘We’re taking the
scenic route’.” One man muttered, “Sounds
like shopping with my wife.” Class was
over soon afterwards.
The crayon factory took a
survey for some new colors. Here are
some of the entries/suggestions: Suspicious cold sore red;
court-ordered urine sample yellow; bulimia green; pregnancy test blue; moral
ambiguity gray; topical ointment white.
I have some of my own. Dull-dinge
grayish-brown; muddy grass stain brownish-green; husband sick green; once in a blue moon blue; embarrassed red;
prayerful knees pink.
“Arriving
late is a way of saying that your own time is more valuable than the time of
the person who waited for you.”
I’ve known people who are late
to just about every event they have been invited to. It is most irritating especially when a meal
is the main focus. On this particular
time, after a decent amount of time waiting, it was decided the meal would be
engaged. The individual arrived just as
dessert was to be served. One feeble
excuse after another poured from their mouth.
Their meal was served to them, but it was at the temperature it had
become as it sat in and on the serving dishes.
A look of, “I dare you to say a word” came from the hostess’ eyes. The quote at the beginning of this account
was written on a piece of paper, handed to the individual for them to
read. The lateness stopped, at least
where these parties were concerned.
My friend Tricia has 3
boys ranging in ages 15 to 9. She was on
her way to work when she realized she’d forgotten an essential part of her
working tools. Here is her account or
the return trip home, “’Was about 10 minutes away from home this morning when I
realized I forgot my phone...ran back to find my middle (age 12) and little
(age 9) eating cheese popcorn, goldfish and M&M's for breakfast. I looked
at them and overheard, "This is why we should wait 15 minutes after she
leaves for work!" Kids and their
wisdom always surprise us.
Some things I’ve thought
about: Why are there commercials for
toilet paper? Who’s not buying this
product?; At my age, temptation is “To nap or not to nap”, but I don’t always
have a choice.; Mr. Ford was my algebra teacher. He said I will use it often, so study
diligently. Well, I’m 70 years old and I
haven’t used it since I was 16 in his class.
He lied!!; I was being mature
until someone brought out the bubble wrap.; Sometimes having more than one
vehicle can be a pain, like when you’re in a large parking lot and you forgot
where you parked AND which vehicle you drove to get there.
A diamond is just a piece
of coal which handled stress exceptionally well. All righty then!!
“The
greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity
and his ability to affect those around him positively.” ― Bob Marley
Printed t-shirts for
turtles----“Faster than something slower.”
Smiles and
blessings------Trudy