Monday, October 31, 2016

2016 November FROM MY PERSPECTIVE



                                  2016 NOVEMBER “From My Perspective”

Brenduhh came over for coffee.  We got to talking about the old days before computers and all that.  I asked her, “Have you ever wondered what your parents did before the internet and television shows which are on 24/7?”  “Yes, I have.  I’ve ask my 18 brothers and sisters and they don’t know either,” she responded.

It’s soup and chili season now at my house.  Each of them is home made and served with home made bread or saltine crackers.  I try to be a lady and break my crackers on the dotted line provided by the manufacturer.  Well, the dotted line is nothing but lies.  Some sadistic, evil person has designed them to NOT break on the line.  This is a nightmare for a person with neat nick tendencies and borders on OCD. 

When Beloved and I went to Omaha, NE during one 4th of July weekend, I did most of the driving.  I like to chew gum during the tense times of driving.  Sometimes it cracks or pops when I least expect it.  I didn’t know Beloved’s annoyance with this until he said, “Stop snapping that gum!”  I kept chewing trying to not do it, but the inevitable happened, it snapped, again.  He growled, “Either spit it out or stop chewing.”  I said, “I’m sorry.  Gum helps me do something with my jaws.”  “Eeeee, gods, Trute, don’t they ever rest?” he groaned.

Do you remember the comic strip CALVIN AND HOBBS?  I do and have some of the books sitting on my coffee table.  There were many words of wisdom between those two.  Here is one of them stated by the strip’s creator, Bill Watterson:  It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning. (Calvin)-Bill Watterson, comic strip artist (b. 5 Jul 1958) [Calvin & Hobbes] Here are some more:  Calvin: "Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?” Calvin: As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.  Calvin: Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend.  Calvin's dad: Being a parent is wanting to hug and strangle your kid at the same time.

I’ve known that scientists are trying to find the center of the universe.  I, also, know some people who are going to be disappointed to find out it isn’t them.

With this election, the decision is so parallel to an electrical socket……Do I put my silver knife blade in the top one or the bottom one?

I unfortunately had a few words with a person who just makes me wince at all the drama and garbage they try to bring me into.  They got angry and stormed, “I’m just not going to talk to you anymore!!”  As I watched them walk away, I called, “Thank you for taking out the trash.”

Some words of wisdom:   Confidence comes not from always being right, but from not fearing to be wrong.” Peter T. McIntyre  True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island... to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing. ” Baltasar Gracian “Light travels faster than sound.  This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.” Somebody

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they're flashing behind you.  Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.   I'm great at multi-tasking -- I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once. 

Did you know the NFL team, Baltimore Ravens, got its name from Edgar Allen Poe who was from Baltimore?  Did you know that a haberdasher is an owner of or worker in a store for men’s clothing or small items used for making clothes?  Harry S Truman, our 33rd President, was a haberdasher.  Did you know that something can be a genuine imitation, but it’s still an imitation?  Did you know that if you get a job at Hooters the job application is a bra and they say, “Here, fill this out.”?  Why does JC Penny’s have an older women’s clothing line named, “Sag Harbor”?  Did you know that the traditional chef’s hat has 100 pleats, which symbolizes the number of ways you can cook an egg?  Did you know that "Only the mediocre are always at their best."?  Jean Giraudoux

Have you ever talked with someone and sworn it was like folding a fitted sheet with no corners?  You roll your eyes, get an eye ache from that, shake your head and get a crick in your neck, then mutter nasties under your breath and they hear you.  CRIMMINIES!!

Brenduhh came up with a terrific solution for keeping cake moist and fresh…..”Trude, you need to eat it all at one sitting.”  Gods!!  Sometimes she comes up with great ideas.

SOCIOPATH:  “They are often well liked because of their charm and high charisma, but they don’t care about other people.  They think mainly of themselves and often blame other for the things that they do.  They have a complete disregard for rules and lie constantly.  They don’t feel guilt or learn from any punishment.”  Psychology 101
The man dies in all who keep silent in the face of tyranny. -Wole Soyinka, playwright, poet, Nobel laureate (b. 13 Jul 1934)  ‘Something to think about this November.

I saw a unique suitcase the other day.  It was in the shape and color of 2 slices of bread.  I bet it was jam packed.

A former student of mine had not been lucky in love.  He’d been engaged a few times and each time she broke it off.  He told me, “Mz. R., the next time I give a ring to someone it will be plastic with a big piece of candy on top.   When it’s gone it will be their fault.”

I have a friend who is so tense, so “tightly wound” that if one put a piece of coal up her butt, in 2 weeks there’d be a diamond!  Peace, blessings, and smiles to you…Trudy

Sunday, October 2, 2016

2016 October FROM MY PERSPECTIVE



2016 OCTOBER “From My Perspective”

Month #10, but it should be #8 because ‘octo’ means eight; ‘novem’ means nine, and; ‘decem’ means ten.  Now, back up to September, which is our ninth month, confusing us because ‘septem’ means seven.  Thank you, Julius and Augustus Caesars, for each of you taking 31 days so our calendar can have your names in as a month.  No wonder some of us are confused. 

A thief broke into the local police station’s laboratory and restroom stealing everything in each area. A spokesperson was quoted as saying, "We have absolutely nothing to go on."

When a person's mean to another, it is, usually, because they know their inadequacies and don't want the other to find them out. You can't blow out another's candle without diminishing your light. It takes more energy to be mean than to be kind, just as it takes more facial muscles to frown than to smile.

“If you planted hope, today, in a heart which felt alone; if you caused a laugh which chased some tears away; if someone’s burden was made lighter because of your kindness, then your day was well-spent.”

A friend of mine had a lot of dandelions in her yard.  A persnickety neighbor put a sign on her door which said, “Do something about those blasted dandelions!!”  She did…..she made a sign with big red letters, “Free dandelions.  Take all you want.”

ONE, a single line which when laid on its side represents a negative, taking away and when it's just the one and it's taken away, it becomes nothing. But TWO, oh two is more. It adds; it has company, companionship, and interaction with another. Take one line away and it's back to ONE.....solitary, perhaps alone, perhaps lonely, perhaps moving to nothing. I'd rather have TWO, then I wouldn't be alone.

I was asked what my relationship status was.  I really didn’t feel it was that person’s business, but I didn’t want to be rude, so I told them, “I sleep diagonally in a king-sized bed; there are two towels in the bathroom and they’re both mine; I fix 4 cups of coffee in the mornings and drink all four; I drive a VW Bug and usually have packages on the other front seat.”  They didn’t ask me anymore personal questions.  I think they were afraid of the answers I give.

There are times when I try to sleep my brain and ADD kick-in together.  They’re not friends and what one doesn’t come up with, the other does.  Here’s an example:  “one sheep, two sheep, a turtle, a cow, a duck…Old MacDonald had a farm, E I E I Oh-h-h hey Macarena!!!” And, since my favorite game is SCATTERGORIES, I’ve made up more categories, and THAT kicks-in with, “What types of dances begin with this letter?  What types of farms are there which begin with this letter?  Where would you go to eat chocolate?”  Maybe some of you can identify with all this. 

A friend sent me this “bucket list”; I wanted to share it with you.  It’s political, so move on if you think you’ll be offended.
                 2016 Special Bucket List  HERE IS WHAT IS WANTED... 
1.  Hillary: held accountable for her previous wrongs!  2. Put "GOD" back in America!!! 3. Borders: Closed or tightly guarded!  4. Congress: On the same retirement & healthcare plans as everybody else.  5. Congress: Obey its own laws NOW!  6. Language: English only, other languages may be spoken among those who know it!  7. Culture: Constitution and the Bill of Rights!  8. Drug Free: Mandatory Drug Screening before & during Welfare!  9. Freebies: NONE to Non-Citizens!  10. Budget: Balance the damn thing!  11. Foreign Countries: Stop giving them our money!  Charge them for our help!  We need it here.  12. Fix the TAX CODE!  And most of all:  13. "RESPECT OUR MILITARY AND OUR FLAG!!"

Have you ever noticed that true heroes are only seen in the eyes of those they've quietly helped? With no accolades and no fall-der-rall, they help and do.  Father’s Day has come and gone, but I think of the women who take on both roles, and to all the dads who do the best they can, the men who accept another’s child as their own and become their father image, and to all the grandparents who had to do it twice. Every day may not be the best day of your life, but there's a blessing in every day, if you look at things right.  (Some of this is contributed by my friend and former student, Andy T.  Thank you, Andy, for your kind and insightful words.)

A hug is like a boomerang---you get it back right away.  Everyone needs a hug.  It’s one of the best gifts you can give.  Did you realize that when you hug someone or something, it encapsulates your heart and you feel good? 

Deer season is coming soon and Bambi is getting revenge. The innocuous deer are annually responsible for an average of 130 deaths to humans in North America.  But, don't fear its bite or hooves. The unfortunate meeting of deer and cars usually is responsible for those deaths.

A former student of mine sent me this.  I don’t get political because I believe everyone has an entitlement to their opinion.  Here’s the smiler or frowner….whichever way you choose:  
I stopped by my local Ford Dealership this morning to look for a new truck. I saw a nice F-350 crew cab loaded with all the options that I liked and asked to take it for a test drive.  The salesperson (a lady wearing a Hillary for President lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its options. She explained that the Electric Seats were connected to the ventilation system and could be set to direct cool air to your butt in the summer & warm air to your butt in the winter.  So I mentioned that this must be a "Trump truck". She looked at me a bit angry and asked why I thought it was a Trump truck. I told her that if it were a Hillary truck, the seats would just blow smoke up my butt year round.  The two mile walk back to the dealership to pick up my truck was worth it.

Brenduhh came over all bubbly.  I’d had a particularly rough morning and was “honked”.  “Hey Trude!!  How are ya today?  Are you going to fix lunch anytime soon as I’ll join you,” she blurted.  “I’ve had a very rough morning and will fix lunch.  It will help me.  I’ll make soup……whiskey with ice cubes.”  So I did and felt better after sipping it for a while.
               Until next month……smiles and blessings-------trudy