Wednesday, September 2, 2015

2015 SEPTEMBER "From My Perspective"



2015 September “FROM MY PERSPECTIVE

A mosquito landed on my teen’s face right after she sassed me……easiest decision of the week!
 
This passage is about envy.  You know that issue we all have once in a while when we forget to count our blessings.  A note of caution: We can never achieve goals that envy sets for us. Looking at your friends and wishing you had what they had is a waste of precious energy. Because we are all unique, what makes another happy may do the opposite for you. That's why advice is nice but often disappointing when needed.”― Marcus Buckingham   

In a Supreme Court sentiment of opposition to a prevailing idea, Justice Scalia recently used the terms “pure applesauce” and “jiggery-pokery”.  Both of the terms are colloquial expressions meaning “deceitful or dishonest manipulation; hocus pocus, humbug.”  They are usually considered British in usage.   I’ve never heard “jiggery-pokery”, but I have heard “applesauce”.  When I was a teen, I told my mother a lie thinking I’d gotten away with it, she responded, “Trudy Jean, that is pure applesauce and you know it.”  It confused me because I knew there was a jar of that stuff in the refrigerator.  Years later when I became a mother I used that term, but it came after the announcement to a difficult child, “I’m the boss, applesauce!”   I heard the fridge door open.



Many of you know how much I like words…different ones are even better.  Here is one I came across.  CLINOMANIA (n) an excessive desire to stay in bed.  I’m sure some of you can identify.                                        



I always wanted to know what it was like to be wealthy and not worry about $$.  Well, at my age of 70 I’ve found out.  I have silver in my hair, gold in my teeth, crystals in my kidney, iron in my arteries, lead in my butt, and an inexhaustible supply of natural gas.  Such a deal!


Brenduhh showed up at the front door the other morning carrying a 100-piece puzzle in a box.  She was a bit irritated.  “What’s wrong, Brenduhh?  I see you have a puzzle with you.”  “Yes, I do.  I was hoping you’d help me with it.  The box says, ‘2-4 years’.  I don’t have that much time to work on this puzzle.  Could you help me, please?”  “How about some coffee or tea, sweetie?  We can put it together at the kitchen table,” I said.



Why are there no Wal-Marts in Iraq, Afghanistan and Iran?  There are too many "Targets".



Have you ever watched a dog chasing its tail, laughed, and thought they are easily amused?   Did you stop to think you were watching the dog chase its tail?  Hmmmm.                    



While walking through the cereal aisle at the grocery store, I noticed all the kids’ cereals where at eye level of a shopping cart.  The CHEERIOS, KIX, Shredded Wheat, ALL-BRAN, Raisin Bran, and SPECIAL K were not.  I guess CAPTAIN CRUNCH, the waskaly wabbit TRIX, COUNT CHOCULA, and FRUIT LOOPS got together and kicked them out to the top and very bottom shelves.   The RICE KRISPIES were next to the marshmallows, though, on a shelf all their own.   I guess the management couldn’t decide if they were for kids or grown-ups or both.



This is from one of my favorite comedians, George Carlin.   He was so observant and shared his observations.  “Remember to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.  Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.  Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.  Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.  Give time to love, give time to speak! And, give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.  And always remember, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by those moments that take our breath away.”  I would like to add:  give a smile to someone each day.  It may be the only one they get and it will be a treasure to them.



Last month I told you about my friends who are raising black and white hens for eggs.  They haven’t laid any eggs, yet, they told me.  I suggested they show the girls the cast iron skillet they use in the kitchen.  “Tell them what it is.  Tell them it may be their permanent home away from home.”  Someone mentioned getting a rooster.  They did and named him Stew.  He’s busy now.



In Sunday school class, we were discussing how the people wandered in the desert for 40 years.  I mentioned, “Of course they did.  None of the leaders asked a woman to take over and lead them to somewhere the masses would enjoy and be comfortable.  Men don’t use maps or ask for directions.  They just walk around aimlessly….sometimes for 40 years telling those complaining, ‘We’re taking the scenic route’.”  One man muttered, “Sounds like shopping with my wife.”  Class was over soon afterwards.



The crayon factory took a survey for some new colors.  Here are some of the entries/suggestions:  Suspicious cold sore red; court-ordered urine sample yellow; bulimia green; pregnancy test blue; moral ambiguity gray; topical ointment white.  I have some of my own.  Dull-dinge grayish-brown; muddy grass stain brownish-green; husband sick green;  once in a blue moon blue; embarrassed red; prayerful knees pink.



Arriving late is a way of saying that your own time is more valuable than the time of the person who waited for you.  I’ve known people who are late to just about every event they have been invited to.  It is most irritating especially when a meal is the main focus.  On this particular time, after a decent amount of time waiting, it was decided the meal would be engaged.  The individual arrived just as dessert was to be served.  One feeble excuse after another poured from their mouth.  Their meal was served to them, but it was at the temperature it had become as it sat in and on the serving dishes.  A look of, “I dare you to say a word” came from the hostess’ eyes.  The quote at the beginning of this account was written on a piece of paper, handed to the individual for them to read.   The lateness stopped, at least where these parties were concerned.



My friend Tricia has 3 boys ranging in ages 15 to 9.  She was on her way to work when she realized she’d forgotten an essential part of her working tools.  Here is her account or the return trip home, “’Was about 10 minutes away from home this morning when I realized I forgot my phone...ran back to find my middle (age 12) and little (age 9) eating cheese popcorn, goldfish and M&M's for breakfast. I looked at them and overheard, "This is why we should wait 15 minutes after she leaves for work!"  Kids and their wisdom always surprise us.



Some things I’ve thought about:  Why are there commercials for toilet paper?  Who’s not buying this product?; At my age, temptation is “To nap or not to nap”, but I don’t always have a choice.; Mr. Ford was my algebra teacher.  He said I will use it often, so study diligently.  Well, I’m 70 years old and I haven’t used it since I was 16 in his class.  He lied!!;  I was being mature until someone brought out the bubble wrap.; Sometimes having more than one vehicle can be a pain, like when you’re in a large parking lot and you forgot where you parked AND which vehicle you drove to get there.



A diamond is just a piece of coal which handled stress exceptionally well.  All righty then!!



The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.  ― Bob Marley


Printed t-shirts for turtles----“Faster than something slower.”



Smiles and blessings------Trudy