2020
June FROM MY PERSPECTIVE
In May there was a riddle going around which asked, “There
are 34 people in a room. You enter the
room and kill 5 of them. How many are in
the room? I was amused at the different
answers and decided to add my calculation.
Here is what I wrote, “Actually, there are 53: 35 in the room to begin with; 5 police
officers to investigate and arrest your butt; coroner and the assistant; 10 men
to load the bodies and take them somewhere, one reporter for the newspaper, and
a partridge looking for a pear tree.
I talk to my dear friend in Florida, often.
At the end of our conversation this particular time, I told her I had to go
pick up my daughter from work. She told
me to drive carefully. She knows I’m a
careful driver, but I decided my response would be legendary. “Nope, not gonna do it. I’m going to drive like I’m at the Indy
500. Some will cheer, some will gasp,
and there will be some chasing after me with pretty lights flashing on the top
of their cars.”
“Momm, I feel pretty important,” said one of my loves years ago.
Trying not to burst their teenaged bubble, I agreed with them, but
cautioned them to not take it as seriously as they were. Evidently they’d not listened as closely as
I’d hoped. They came home about a week
later and were upset. They’d lost their
“pretty important” position. Gently I
encouraged them to come outside and look at the stars. I was hoping to be able to use the heavens as
a didactic tool. “Look at all those
stars,” I said. “Do you know that each
one has a place of importance until it wanes in its brilliance? It won’t necessarily be forgotten because it
served a purpose for a certain amount of time in a certain place. Then another moves in.” I watched as the child mentally ruminated
what I’d said. They asked, “Momm, could
you put that in simpler terms, please?”
Lovingly I said, “Yes; the next time you fluff yourself up with thinking
you’re “pretty important”, go look at the stars. It will put everything in perspective.”
Light travels faster than sound.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
I read that a recent study found dark chocolate helps in
treating coughs more than codeine; codeine is sometimes used in cough medicines. The chemical, theobromine, is in
chocolate. “Subjects were given a 1,000
mg. theobromine tablet…the equivalent of about five Hershey’s Special Dark
bars, or over 1,000 calories!” Coupled
with a few glasses of wine to help me relax, I’m not going to care if I’ve
exceeded the calorie limit for the day.
Sometimes the “old” medicine isn’t so bad.
I grew up in the fifties with practical parents---a mother,
God bless her, who washed aluminum foil after she cooked in it, then reused
it. A father, God bless him, who was
happier getting old shoes fixed than buying new ones. My parents weren’t poor---“just satisfied and
comfortable,” Daddy would say. Their
marriage was good, their dreams focused.
Their best friends lived barely a wave away. I can see them now, Daddy in trousers, an old
shirt and his favorite grey sweater, Mother in a house dress---lawn mower in
his hand, dishtowel in hers. It was a
time for fixing things: a curtain rod,
the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door, and the hem in a dress. Things you keep. It was a way of life, and sometimes it made
me crazy. All that re-fixing,
re-heating, re-newing, I wanted just once to be wasteful. Waste meant affluence. Throwing things away meant there’d always be
more. On two cold Spring mornings in the chill of the rooms, I was struck with
the pain of learning that sometimes there isn’t any “more.” Sometimes what you care about most, gets all
used up and goes away, never to return, except for the memories. So, while you have it, it’s best to love it
and care for it and fix it when it’s broken and heal it when it’s sick. That’s true for marriage and old cars and
children with bad report cards and dogs with bad hips and aging parents. You keep them because they’re worth it,
because you’re worth it. Some things you
keep---like a best friend that moved away or a classmate you grew up with. There are just some things that make life
important…people you know are special…and you KEEP them close! May each of you keep the other close.
My beloved, Guy, prided himself in being accurate at what he
does. “After all, I was in military
intelligence where accuracy is very important; and, I majored in geography and
political science in college where accuracy is, also, very important,” was his
rationale. One day he had to count his
daily medicine to make sure he had enough for the trip we were preparing to go
on. Later that day he realized he’d made
a mistake in counting--- he’d forgotten to take into count the medicine he has
to take twice a day. He kept lamenting
about his mistake indicating he was having a lot of trouble accepting that he’d
made an error. To help him put his error
in perspective I said, “Well, at least this wasn’t a goof-up I’ve had to bring
to your attention. You need to be rejoicing
about me not saying anything.” With
that, he retorted, “I think I’ll start admitting my mistakes frequently just to
keep you quiet.” Smart ass
I’ve lived in the city and in the country. The measure of distance and time is
different---the country one is the most colorful---not as exact as city. Here are examples of country which I’ve
known: Next door = 1-2 minutes; Right up
the road = 5-10 minutes; A couple ‘a miles = 10-20 minutes; not too far = 20-50
minutes; A little ways = over an hour; A pretty good drive = 2 hours+. “Down yonder; as the crow flies; a good
piece; to the hard road” all these expressions of distance and time factor
depend on the terrain. Hill/mountainous…you
can bet it is going to take more time than if it is flat land; and then there
is “ya might wanna pack a snack”.
Brenduhh came over for a chat and tea. During the
conversation, I mentioned, "A blue whale can make a fart bubble so big a
horse could fit in it." I saw the hamster wheel of her mind turning
and braced for something coming from her thinking. "If a blue whale
can make a fart bubble so big a horse could fit in it, what kind of horse would
it be? You know, Trudy, there are many different sizes of horses from the
very large Shires to the very little miniature horse. And, who was under
the whale measuring the fart bubble, and don't you think the methane gas in
that bubble would knockout the person measuring the bubble? What about
the vibration of releasing the fart; wouldn't that be too much vibration to
hold the measuring instrument?" Good questions, but I wasn't ready
to engage her in the answers---I was afraid of what would be said or more
questions from her.
I noticed in May a daily planner for 2020 was on sale for
$1.00. Boy, talk about a waste of money
on that item!
There have been times I’ve thought and even said, “Are you
that stupid?” only to have someone take it as a challenge and another say,
“Here, hold my beer.” I, also, know
someone who is not real sharp with their thinking. In fact, if their brain was a knife, it
wouldn’t cut running water.
Sometimes English words just don’t make sense. I was using the numbers---primary,
secondary---to represent position and came to the third position calling it
“Thirdiary”. I was saying this to my big
Guy. He asked me to stop and questioned,
“What is ‘thirdiary’?” I told him, “It’s
the number three position like first is primary, second is secondary; so, third
would be thirdiary.” He shook his head,
laughed and told me, “That seems logical to you, but the third position is called
‘TERTIARY’, the fourth position is called ‘QUARTARY, and the fifth position is
‘QUINARY’, and so on.” I thanked him for
the information with, “Thank you for your tertiary quartary leading to a
quinary of multitudinous supplications and a partridge in a pear tree.” He told me to go away…imagine that!
The more I know, the more I know I don’t know. During the
quarantine/pandemic/lock-in/stay-at-home-stay-safe time we’ve had, I learned
there is so much one can do to keep busy and pass the time. I didn’t know one could dust so often and
still find more to whish away, nor that I have more “stuff/blessings” that I
ever realized; that sometimes loved ones get on the last nerve, but you don’t
want to mention it because you know they’ll tell you the same thing about you;
that peanut butter and jelly can be gourmet; that a simple “I love you” can
bring tears of joy, gratefulness, and humility.
But, most of all, awakening to another day is what it’s all
about----awakening to ANOTHER day. May
you have many more days in which to awaken.
Hugs, blessings, and many smiles---Trudy
