🍎🎃 🍎🎃 🍎🎃 🍎🎃 🍎🎃 🍎🎃
Brenduhh came over with a
paper and pen. “Hi! I’ve been told to write down all the states
in the United States in alphabetical order.
I’m stuck on how to spell that state, Hawaii.
Would you help me, please, Trudy?” she asked. I checked her list to see if she had any
others which might need correcting.
“Well, it’s really easy. You’ll
need two I’s,” I began. She squinted,
pursed her lips, and shook her head at me.
“You really are a smarty pants this morning! I already have two eyes, and they’re working
just fine!” she grumbled.
Well, we made it to
October. Have you ever noticed the bugs
and the way they fly and behave in this month?
Do you know why? Well, I believe
they know they’re going to die and they just don’t want to be civil any
more. So they take the liberty of
pestering you with walking or flying into your space. They go for the dive bombing and kamikaze
tactics at your face. Sometimes it’s
just absolute “up close and personal” with them. This is why I don’t allow myself to fall
asleep in my chair. When I do, my mouth
usually falls open and then…..well, you know the bugs’ mentality in
October…they like to explore dark, moist caves.
I had a dear, sweet
person---my first best friend of my life---tell me she enjoys reading my column
every month because she likes to “camp out in my brain” to explore what I’m
thinking. She asked how I come up with
some of the stuff I put in the column. I
can’t exactly tell how I do it, it just happens. Perhaps it’s a sight, sound, odor, or feeling
which brings forward a memory or connection to a random thought that’s looming
on the precipice of consideration. The
2022 September’s edition (the account of my 6 year old son singing GOD IS
GREATER THAN THE BOOGIE MAN, in the throes of a tornado drill which turned out
to be the real thing) is an example of a memory connection coupled with a few
words. I think the key word(s) is “connection” or “memory”; and, the longer I
live, the more connections and memories I get.
There was a knock at the
door. I opened it and saw my favorite
Lady of the Holler standing there with a cherry pie in her hands. “Oh Aint Daisy, come on in. How nice of you to come over, but I must
apologize for my messy house. I haven’t
had time to put things in order. She
stepped through the doorway, took off her red and black shawl, and asked if we could go to
the kitchen and share the pie. Of course
I had her come with me. Drat, the dirty
dishes were still stacked to be washed, but the table was clean. I apologized for the dirty dishes still on
the side of the sink. She sat down and
smiled at me as I got out the two plates, forks, and triangular pie slice
serving utensil. I cut the pie. Oh gosh,
it was heaven in a dish. I served her
and me and sat down to chat. I
apologized again for the messes. She
listened and smiled. The twinkle in her
eyes told me she was going to say something important. “Chile, I don’t pay no mind to the
messes. We all have ‘em from time to
time. I’ve come to see YOU, talk with YOU, enjoy YOU, and share some pie with
YOU. I hain’t a-goin’ to get any
enjoyment out of those messes, but I will out of bein’ with you. So jes’ remember when I come over, I’m a-comin’
to see and enjoy YOU, jes’ YOU.” Oh, the
comforting wisdom of that dear lady----my friend, the Lady of the Holler.
I don’t go to concerts
because I can get the same music at the library, listen to it in quiet, and go
to a clean bathroom when I need to.
However, I have a friend who enjoys going to concerts and purchased a
ticket through a ticket distribution company.
They got their bill. It had so
many fees; the base price was reasonable, but everything else was inane. Here is my friend’s rendition of the
bill: concert ticket: $35, Venue fee:
$20, Access fee: $15, Paperless Transaction Fee: $12, Fee fee: $5, Fee fi fo fum fee: $7, We
can fee: $2, So what fee: $3, Another-contribution-won’t-hurt fee: $2, and the most laughable one----Toilet
paper use fee: $1.
Be careful when you answer
your phone from a number you don't recognize. If you're asked a question,
such as your name, and are to say, "yes" or "nor as a response,
do NOT do it. There are scammers out there using your name, voice, and
"yes" response to purchase various high priced items. They have
all sorts of electronic ways of them being you, including your voice. I
usually answer with, "Affirmative" or "Correct" or "It
is the one you are intending and asking for." This really confuses a
robo-call. Of course, that's my intention, anyway. Sometimes I even
use another language...one I've made up as I talk. Imagine that!!
I was asked from a friend
my opinion of a situation involving a challenged child and what I would suggest
would help. I drew on all my knowledge,
experiences, research, and education.
When I finished, I said, “Well, there is my two cents’ worth.” My friend replied, “Not really, Trudy. It’s is more like $1.95 because you gave a
professional opinion, personal and professional experiences, and
knowledge.” I told her, “Hmmm, inflation
is everywhere.”
I have a dear friend who
has many, many people asking her to do for them. She has a lot of difficulty telling each one
of them, including her dogs, “NO!” She
was telling me of all she had been doing for others over the last week. I listened intently, and then said, “I truly
hope your life, for a day or two, winds down to complete boredom.” She laughed and said, “You’re great at
keeping my broken sack of marbles together.”
I told her, “Well, that’s because I’m usually looking for the marbles I’ve lost.” We went for the snort,
y’all.
Have you ever noticed that
through the “storms” of your life there usually comes a rainbow of peace? He keeps his promises.
I went to the doctor to listen about my blood sugar
should be lower, blood pressure should be lower, and weight should be lower.
Hell's bells, he doesn't mention a thing about my boobs being lower.
Brenduhh came over in a huff. “Settle down, missy,” I told her. She became momentarily quiet then snapped, “I don’t do the calm and carry on thing, Trudy. I do the spontaneously combust and go totally mental thing.” “Oh. Well try to chill-out. Now what else is bothering you?” I queried. “You know I’m taking American geography at the junior college. There was a test yesterday which required us to give the capital of each state. I failed the test.” “50 states and their capitals are tough to remember. Let me quiz you. What is the capital of Ohio?” I asked. “The capital of Ohio is O; and, it’s the only state which begins with a capital O,” she said proudly. I hung my head.
Peace, smiles, and blessings until next month--------Trudy
Bwahahaha! "O"
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